Through the paths one takes there are many ups and downs, personal joys and disappointments, times to rejoice and times of sadness, the beauty of new life and the grief of loves lost. The challenge in all of these experiences is how we interpret and learn from them.
Today I received news that was different from what I had hoped. It wasn’t what I wanted to learn but I also anticipated the outcome. It took months of waiting and a new sample to process..in the end the text I received at 4:40 a.m. was based on scientific data. The DNA test was complete and it found that Nita and I do not share a father.
The pictures of Nita’s father and my birthmother so many years ago swirled through my brain. There were bits and pieces of stories of the relationship fifty years ago. Two refugees from Hungary making a new life in Buffalo with a group of fellow Hungarians. Friends who looked for new beginnings. And later there were pictures to stare at, looking for similarities. Following the shape of a nose, looking at the expressions in the eyes..wondering ..and waiting. I did not see resemblances. I did not feel it from deep inside, but still I hoped.
But if life’s challenges are there for us to meet, and work through, they are also there for us to reflect. No matter what the situation or experiences there is something to take from it and something to grow from. While I would have loved to have learned Nita ‘s father was my birthfather..he is not. I do not perceive this as a road block, just a path which has met its end. It answers the question I have held onto for a few years. It is better to know the truth than to wonder.
I haven’t decided what course I will take next. For now it is good to know I have shared a part of my life’s journey with Nita. She is a lovely young woman. We have become quick friends and I look forward to meeting her this summer. We have found each other and shared a part of our lives and that is a lot. Puszi Nita!